We're born with millions of little lights shining in the dark

And they show us the way 

one lights up every time we feel love in our hearts 

one dies when it moves away

a month ago, I was counting the specks of dust glinting in the light of a 4am sunrise, the change I needed for a Mars Bars from the vending machine across the room and the hours I had before my Jurisprudence paper.

three weeks ago, I was counting the number of unwatched Suits episodes I had, the number of underwear to pack and the days, mostly the days.

a week ago, I was counting the exchange rate of the Pound against three different currencies, the walking distance between Metro A to tram station B versus Metro C to tram station A, and the number of McD burgers I had to get to rid of my foreign coins.

today, I'm up at 9am on a Sunday morning with over eight hours of sleep sipping on tea and honey and I'm sure I should go for a jog, roast a turkey, start picketing against the minimum wage.

sounds like a plan. 

we were so young, so sure, so naive.

sometimes I'm pretty damn sure that my insides are crumbling away like cheap store bought pastries.

a shit ton of coffee,  Panadols and Treaties to wade through in the next 2 weeks.

 that steep cliff looks almost comforting now.

jk.

i never learn haih.

pain on a scale of 1-10 true events only 1, mid crossing one of the busiest streets in London backpack's right strap breaks 2, going to class with laptop and law books backpack's left strap breaks 3, walking into window sill/slicing thumb along with garlic 4, 1RM deadlift/squat/walking after leg/back day 5, meeting someone new and messing it up three seconds later 6, pressing the next button on an old Instagram account 7, losing a pet dog 8, twelve thousand words dissertation paper 9, a breakup 10, giving up Kettle chips