never mind the achy feeling I chose to ignore, never mind the niggling discomfort that I'm binge eating, never mind that sheer emptiness is worse than plain old hurt
and I thought it would diminish over time.
apparently not when I wake up crying
see, for a while, I refuse to admit that it made me happy, more than happy maybe, turned up the corners of my mouth, gave me a bounce in my walk, and every cliche quote you can come up with that oozes with happiness
so now that it came back to pummel me right in the gut, I don't have a right to sit and wallow in self-pity do I.
I want to look back, filter every moment, delete off the less than perfect moments, and when I pierce it back together, it will be how I want to remember it by, who cares that the pieces slide together into the empty spaces and never fit quite right, I like it that way.
