I have this sudden urge to don on a tacky apron and start whipping up amazing meals in the kitchen   or bake pink cake pops with sprinkles for a 5 year old's party wtf serious one -________- think I've been spending way to much time on sites featuring 'Yummy Mummies' and '50 Easy Reciepes from a stay-at-home-mum' HAHA

or maybe I'm just hungry

can't wait to go back tomorrow and stuff myself with CNY cookies

and Feb shall be a Fab month.

(hahahahahahahahahaha joke la pessimist here)

28/1/2013

I should be studying for tomorrow's Math test but I decided to stay at home instead and catch up on Running Man.

*pats myself on the back for, well. being true to myself

*smug

(actually under a lot of pressure after going over to IMU walao the requirements seriously lor smr fee so high practically like studying overseas building so small smr if i don't get the twinning program i'll be stranded there for 5 whole years i like shopping la but doesn't mean i want to be stuck in a mall like building for my entire uni life btw it really used to be a mall i know cause Shaun told me that while he brought me on a tour around seriously doubting myself now maybe i should just pick a less complicated career path like accounting oh God my entire family has a background in accounting and there's me giving up on accounts after slaving over it in form 4 why must i give up on everything this time i shall toughen up (HAHA) and actually put in more effort instead of being the quitter i am *crucial moment excuses myself for not being true to myself shut up Mel shut up)

ANYWAY.

had a *SURPRISE dinner for Julia last night (she's leaving for Aus in a week or two T__T even though we stay 2 minutes away from each other i don't see her often anymore T__T) also celebrated Shireen, Pang and her birthdays :)

*I'd had enough with people ruining SURPRISES so this is the last time I'm going to go about secretly planning anything and having someone blab it out a few hours before the SURPRISE sorry still a sore subject but yeah no more SURPRISES next time i'm creating an event on Facebook so there

my gorgeous friend! we were classmates for 2 years and saw each other practically everyday T_______T
 gonna miss her so much T_________T

most of the pictures are up on Facebook already (i'm so damn efficient when it comes to stuff like this it's puzzling why i'm such a mess when it comes to studies...........or maybe not)

and i say most of because some..... didn't make the cut hahahaahahahha

us signing cards and photos at the last minute at Vinson's workplace (forgot to take pictures sorry ah just imagine us occupying an entire table with our stuff didn't buy anything from them smr lol) .................. and Wendy posing with their presents

after that reached Autocity also occupy few tables in Starbucks getting everyone else to sign the cards and waited for Julia's mum to give us the cue to go over to Tao (DIDN'T ORDER ANYTHING AGAIN LOLZ)

and I fell backwards on a chair in Starbucks. in a dress. Oh God i'm not fit to be a girl

oh yah. damn funny we walked in in a straight line while singing and Tao was so crowded smr the waiter took a video of us and i was in front of the line wtfz

MY GIRL FRIENDS DAMN GORGEOUS RIGHT

and them guys

had to separate into 2 tables :(

i think we ordered close to 100 sets of scallops? LOL and i was still hungry after the dinner wth ate 2 and a half bowls of ice-cream smr

our outfits weren't planned teehee

(idk why but i found this amusing and started laughing to myself)

it's supposed to be some emo shot HAHA

(p/s: I'll cut my hair when it's ankle length)

LOL i look so awkward omg

Alson n Julia


Shireen n Wendy


LOL Sorry last one of Wendy and I lololol


sang the Birthday song thrice hahahahaha

(the waitress looks as excited as Pang LOL)






30th - 31st - 24th








when your date ignores you ....................


time for me to hit the gym



MODELZ










Kenvyn / Alson / Vinson / me / Shireen (and Wendy) / Collin








right day to be dressed in black, everyone else was kinda....neglected lol




THIS IS OUR 'CLUBBING' SHOT






our 'OOTD's picts LOLZZ

(didn't make the cut for Facebook hahahaha)


nah no braces d must grin more

(plz focus on them teeth and not my double chin)


stood in the middle of the road and talked for a long time . IDK WHY WE ALWAYS DO THAT. got smthg important to discuss okay here's a rubbish bin/an entrance to a restaurant/parking lot now we can start discussing

btw we were going on about swag LOL we haz so much swag yo

OK. it's 3 am now guess I should continue Running Man. Nights! :D

lol hi. idk. bye.

Going to KL tomorrow . SO TIRED.

......................so i didn't do as bad as i expected, can only thank God.Seriously THANK YOU FOR ANSWERING MY PRAYERS.

 and like my Bio lecturer said, getting a borderline A translates to studying extra hard for A2.

it's not amazing but I'm really grateful

wth feel like slamming everyone

haha hi. so i figured, my blog needs some pictures so here are some from the past, idk, 1-2 months?

Jawa Mee at The Little Nyonya Cuisine @ Gurney, okok laa, was rushing to cont shopping with Mum hahaha // Chatime w/ Wendy during my break // eyebags hahahaha // i think Xuan Xin has better food compared to Dragon-i leh, one of my fave dishes there!


Raja Uda's tomyam noodles heaps of fried fish yay // HAHA this is me being gay (AND I LOST THOSE EARRINGS DAMN SAD T___T)  // Mum makes the best bread pudding! (i know it doesn't looks appealing here but it is T_T) // drinks on New Year Day after the disappointing wait for fireworks at Gurney :(


pasemburrrrr // take pic near near biggest cheat ever // Octopus and Chili Padi , best combination ever can! (on second thought i say that a lot especially when it involves chocolate, peanut butter, bacon and cheese)  // Shopped with WanQing and this is all i bought hahahaha the rings too small can only fit on my pinky i need to lose weight T____T


mum's cooking and Running Man on the telly // dinner with fam @ Swensen


haha I LOVE POPCORN, watched Jack Reacher with my brother // hi this is my brother pre haircut LOL // he calls me fat and buys me tons of keropok lekor (2 more packets at home) // boardgames with his friends


so relieved i didnt buy this top the second time i went and tried it out i found out the back's see through walao next time try clothes must turn 360 degrees before buying // Bottomless tortilla chips with Dharsh at Chili's ! // HAHA fat face after hiking/jogging/cardio T___T // went hiking again today, got damn freaked out 'cause there was a troop of monkeys coming over in our direction and we were alone in some desolated jungle like area T_____T oh and this is my fruit juice hahaha

i need to stop resisting change, like maybe actually make the effort to make more friends instead of going back to the same people?

andddddddddddd. (i;m sorry that everything comes back and revolves around this) i have 4 chapters of Bio to study before my test this Fri but i left my books in my locker so ......

(walao skipped 8 classes d i give up la i give up)

it's 6.45am and I'm still wide awake.

so worried over AS results. I know how stupid this sounds, because 1. no amount of fretting will help 2. neither will losing sleep 3. i deserve shitty results . but i can't help it. it's really easy to figure out when i'm going through 'my tough moments' (*shows -__________- face) because i lose sleep so easily. a tiny problem comes my way and BAM i stay awake the entire night (i'm not sure why i used bam hahaha) i don't care about failing all my monthly tests and trial exams but when it comes to the actual external exams i'm some psycho perfectionist and i will start sobbing like one too in front of everyone T____T i'm going to be so humiliated when the results are out. i deserve it i deserve it i should score really well in A2 this will be my motivation it has to be when everyone else who actually worked hard and are all satisfied with their results i will be genuinely happy for them (not that i wasn't planning on not being happy for them la but shall not allow myself to be in a crappy mood) (okay maybe a bit) (but don't show it) I'M SO SCARED. and I feel so guilty whenever I pray cause it feels like I only really come to God when I'm in need and the rest of the time when I'm contented and all I kinda neglect to really thank Him and all.

never felt so useless before

and typing that out makes me feel worse. like some whiny person asking for sympathy arghh i'm not i'm just 'going through one of my tough moments' (ahahhaahhaha have to laugh every time i type that) okay sounds even more pathetic

i'm just afraid of letting my parents down.
anger compared to disappointment is barely a dent in the ground and the latter is probably close to idk an empty void swallowing up the entire universe *exaggeration

okay but yeah and i can't stand the thought of disappointing them especially when they trust me so much with my studies

I HATE DIZ I NEED TO SLEEP SUCH A DYSFUNCTIONAL PERSON

10 more days T_________________________________T

TODAY IS A CHEAT DAY. 

I try soooo hard to cut down on carbs and reduce my calorie intake on days I have classes. (most successful days -> Mondays and Tuesdays. only have 2 meals on those days T_T) but it is so difficult to keep to it especially now that the management in charge of the canteen changed and they sell roti canai instead of fruits HAHA. and I'm starving almost all the time. and i can get junk food yummy food oily food yummy yummy super good oh God must stop myself .

So Friday, when I get back . I eat. everything. EVERYTHING. I just feed my way through all my Mum's homemade dishes. go out to the Friday night market (which is really near my house) and buy junk. go out with my brother (who's on a really long sem break and always keen on buying me food) (so IRONIC because he said : you are so damn fat you;ll be forever alone and he asks me if i want to eat fried chicken. what is this?!?!) P/s: of course i want.

I have to stop this

stopstopstopstopstopstopstopstopstopstopstopstopstop

right after i finish my keropok lekor

ok so i haven't exactly been an amazing student, neither will i be getting better grades than most of my classmates but at least i made an effort to attend every class (even though i still feel sick from sitting in the first row for Statistics wth so boring chemistry fell asleep flat on my face lecturer also didn't notice or probably used to already) and I revised the first chapter of Bio!!!!!!!!!!!!!

huge achievement coming from someone who doesn't revise shit until the exam schedules are given out 

now i just need a short break (2 weeks tops) and a tutor to catch up on those 5 chapters of Math ^^

not too bad laa. bye ! 

so it isn't always fun, presents, fairy lights, blurred out shots, edited to mask out the imperfections, so we don't get to stay within our comfort zones, not everyone you meet has the best of intentions, decisions, so many decisions to be made and they come along weighed down with risks, wariness doesn't really work, feelings are seldom mutual, screw ups that seem beyond repair; 

why even bother right.

Hi so it's the first day of the year so I guess this is an obligatory post

*FREAKS OUT.

Class starts tomorrow and my books are still buried in my suitcase

*FREAKS OUT

AS results out in 21 days

*FREAKS OUT

Haven't been sleeping before 5am for weeks

so 2013 it is

*punches fist into the air with fake enthusiasm